I miss my brother. Somedays I wonder why it is so easy to go about my every day life as if nothing is wrong when in the back of my mind I can't get over the fact that our country is at war and my brother is on a ship further away than I ever imagined possible at the center of this war.

There are so many opinions about this war, I see the protestors on tv and I am thankful that I live in a place like Fargo, North Dakota where the only people protesting are college kids, and there aren't even very many of those. I can drive down the street and see people proudly flying flags, not burning them. I am thankful that I don't live in a place where I would have to fight through crowds due to people protesting a war that my brother and many others are risking their lives for.

I can't and won't believe that my brother is in danger for an unjust cause. I can't and won't believe that the American lives that we have lost so far are for nothing. I am not a republican but I am proud to support our President and I am proud to be an American and I am thankful that there are brave men and women who are willing to put their lives at risk for the safety of others. I don't think that anyone wants to go to war but I do believe that there are times when it is unavoidable.

So I go about my daily life, washing dishes, going to work, playing games with the kids. I wonder what life is like in Iraq, what is it like to be a mom in Iraq today? My heart is heavy for them because I can't even imagine the fear of not knowing what tomorrow will bring. But I have to believe that someday in the distant future, when my grandchildren are sitting in their history class, they will see a picture of the planes flying off of the USS Abraham Lincoln and they will know that their great-uncle was on that ship and they will be proud to know that he had a small part in helping to make this world a better place. Maybe someday women in Iraq will be able to spend a Saturday grumbling about how much laundry they have left to do and why on earth can't their children stop slamming the screen door as they go out to play without a fear of what tomorrow will bring. Until that day I hold in my heart the wish that my brother, and all of the men and women overseas will come home safe to a crowd of people, not protesting what they did but thanking them for a job well done.

This photo is of my little brother Gilbert
taken a few weeks before he left
on deployment July 21, 2002.

It is Saturday and I have so much to do. After a week of everyone going to work/school/daycare during the day and nights of homework, dinners, projects, etc. we are all ready to have a day of doing nothing. Of course that isn't possible because today is the day to do all of the other stuff that we didn't get around to doing during the week. You know things like cleaning! ROFL Our house is a mess, laundry has piled up, the bathroom needs a good scrubbing, and the basement has toys everywhere.

On top of that, Brittany is working on one of those school projects that seems to require more work from me than it does for her. Her class is writing an autobiography which will have to cover her entire 12 years of life and our family history. We have completed the first chapter. Notice I said "WE". I had to wrack my brain trying to remember her entire first year of life, thank goodness I kept a very detailed baby book.....well actually two baby books, I am a little nervous that Anthony will have to do this same project someday because I never did make him a baby book. Anyway, we had to scan pictures and put them into book style. I know that in the end this will be a wonderful keepsake but for now it is just a pain in the ass, it has been way too time consuming and time these days is something that I don't seem to have much of.

Danielle has to make an "invention" for the invention fair and I have a feeling that this will also be something that I will have to spend quite a bit of time on. To make things even more difficult my printer is broke so until we can get a new one I have to email everything I need printed to either my mom's house or to work so that I can print it out.

But of course things like printers go on the back burner when you have things like transmissions going out. That happened in January and if you have ever had to buy a transmission for a Town & Country minivan you know that they are not cheap. Thankfully, we work for a parts place because we were able to put it on an account and make payments. I hate owing people money so hopefully that will get paid off soon.

I think I mentioned that I have a lot of stuff to do today, notice that I am still here. Maybe if I keep blogging all day I won't have to go and clean the bathroom. Ha! As if that is going to happen. Actually, I have to get going shortly, Brittany is babysitting today. She had her first babysitting job last Saturday and she was really excited to be asked to babysit again today. She also had our neighbors call her last night to see if she could babysit for a few hours today but since she had already commited to babysit for someone else I told them that I would watch their kids because they had to go into work for a few hours. They have four kids so my house will be insane for a few hours and of course it doesn't look nice enough to send them outside to play. Well, I'd better go, it is getting late and I have way too much to do. I made a few visits to my favorite blogs but there are so many that I haven't had a chance to visit yet, so hopefully I will get a chance to do that later. Have a great weekend!

Last weekend it was so warm here the kids played outside in shorts and tank tops. Today I drove home from work with great, big, fluffy snow flakes falling down. Hopefully it won't last because it was really nice to send the kids out to play last Saturday. One of our neighbors came over last Saturday and we drank coffee on the back step while we watched our kids play. It was so relaxing.

Well, I was hoping to get a bit longer post but I have to get going because Anthony told the girls that we were going to have Chinese food for dinner (I have NO idea where he got that idea from!) and they were so excited about it that I couldn't say no! lol Everyone is upstairs waiting for me so I guess I'd better get running.

I am hoping to have time to work on a new layout here tomorrow and when I am done with that I will hopefully be able to visit everyone and say "hello!" Have a great night! :-)

Hmm....It has been quite some time since I've been here, I think I might have forgotten what to do. LOL

I wish I could say that I had a solid reason as to why I have been offline for so long, but I would have to say it has been a combination of things. First, my internet service was acting weird and would kick me off every time I tried to get online, second I still have this damn cable modem sitting on my desk but it hasn't been hooked up because my piece of crap computer doesn't have the right card which I have been too lazy to install. On top of that I guess I would just have to say that my real time life has been so busy that I just haven't had time to be here. I apologize for leaving you all hanging and just up and disappearing, I would completely understand if none of you ever came back to visit me......but I hope you do. :-)

There is so much to share and if you have read any of my blog you know that I can ramble so I will try to put this all in a nutshell. All is well with me and my little family, the kids are getting big, they all had birthdays in the last month or so. Brittany is 12 and is getting very nervous about going into the middle school next year, Danielle is now 9 and is making new friends in our new neighborhood, and Anthony is now 4 and is getting way too big! Work is going very well, I enjoy being back there and all of the problems that caused me to leave in the first place have been resolved. I am enjoying being married probably a little too much because I need to go on a major diet. Why is it that when I am unhappy and alone I am thin and look my best but when I am happy and content I get fat? How stupid is that? Anyway, I won't bore you with that but hopefully I will be able to get rid of this weight because I refuse to buy new clothes! lol

I am desperately missing my brother who is serving on the USS Abraham Lincoln. He left right after my wedding and was supposed to be home in January but if you have watched any news lately you know where he is. I am so proud of him for serving our country but I just want him to be safe and come home. It is hard for me to write about it without wanting to cry. I spend way too much time watching the news and thankfully I am still able to hear from him often via email.

Oh, I had a birthday. I am now 30! Can you believe that? I would say that I feel old but I don't, well some days I do, but for the most part I just can't believe I am 30. Where in the hell did my 20's go? Oh yeah, I was getting married, having babies, and getting divorced. Speaking of divorce, Jorge, my ex-husband and his wife had a baby girl last month. They named her Cassandra and the girls are excited to meet their new baby sister when they go to California this summer.

Well, I guess I shouldn't try to cram several months into one entry and I am having a hard time writing because Brittany keeps interrupting me to listen to a song she is writing. Their school doesn't have a "school song" so their music teacher told them all to write a song and I guess they are going to vote for the best one. So she keeps singing me her lyrics and I keep losing my train of thought so I will try to work on this tomorrow and will hopefully have time this weekend to get a new look in here, something that will help me clean out all the "cobwebs".